I have been a mother for almost eight years now and a wife for thirteen. I have a confession, I have never gone on a trip out of state by myself or with friends since becoming a wife and mother. Besides the occasional sleepover at their grandparents, I have only been away from my kids for one night since they were born. However, last July (2018) my husband and I got away for a long weekend to Williamsburg. That was wonderful and the first time we got away since our honeymoon. For years, we were paying off debt, so we couldn’t justify going on a trip. We had however gone on weeklong trips with my family to my favorite place, Outer Banks, North Carolina. My husband has been on work trips and every year goes away for 5 days for hunting. I myself have never gone away.
Recently, I was given the opportunity to get away to Newport, Rhode Island. Several Outlander fans were getting together for a Finale party. I was invited to join fellow staff members of the blog that I am a staff member of, for a long weekend. I desperately needed to get away. I had gone through a bout of anxiety earlier in January and thought I needed some time away and a chance to clear my head and be carefree. It was the chance of a lifetime.
It was wonderful to drive by myself, listen to music or an audiobook. I could stop when I wanted to. I was just alone in my thoughts. Once I got there, I even went on a tour of The Breakers mansion by myself. That was glorious. I had it on my bucket list for so long and could now check it off! It was exhilarating. It definitely lit a fire for more trips, maybe even solo.
You can do this…
I know what you are probably thinking. You have mom guilt. Your kids and your husband need you. But you know what? You need yourself. You owe it to yourself. Ever hear of self care? This is a form of self care. If you have travel anxiety, I get it but you need to put your fears aside and do it!
All I am talking about is a weekend. Not a whole week. A weekend. Two days. If you are feeling daring, try a Friday-Sunday (or even Monday). But the kids are in school, you say? Put your big girl pants on and ask someone to watch your kids until your husband gets home. Or better yet, have your husband stay home- hey, you are home with the kids most of the time right?!? He can experience it alone too!
How I did it…
When I went away it was Saturday-Monday. My husband was with them all weekend and Monday he put our oldest on the bus and took our youngest to his mom’s and she watched him all day. I was home by the time the oldest got off the bus. I’m telling you, you can do this.
I use to feel resentful of my husband who worked an evening a week and one Saturday a month. Then he became a realtor and he was gone some evening showing houses. I never got away by myself.
Since, I went on that trip- I have been to the local coffee house, the library and Target several times by myself. I love going to the coffee house (if you don’t know me or have not read the ‘about me’ page, my dream is to own a coffeeshop/house) and smelling the wonderful coffee wafting through the air and ordering my favorite drink (mocha latte) and blogging. I try to blog on Mondays and that almost never works with a preschooler running around and asking for fruit snacks or another snack every 10 minutes. It doesn’t do much for my train of thought! It’s been wonderful just to sit and let my thoughts run free.
Repeat after me…
Do not wait until your kids are in middle school or high school and can kind of handle themselves. Do it while your kids are little. You need a break and a chance to refill your tank.
Think of how rejuvenated you will feel if you get away for a few days, get some uninterrupted sleep and pamper yourself.
So if you are getting short with children (no I never felt like this- lies), feel like you are ready to commit yourself (I felt this way), letting yourself go….get yourself a girlfriend and schedule a time to get away from your kids. Don’t have a friend or girlfriends that can get away (send them to this blog post)? You can even get away by yourself, reserve a hotel room at the beach or other favorite place and just go…
Ideas for a getaway:
- Hotel with a spa
- The beach
- A cabin- preferably one with running water and indoor facilities (ask me how I know)
- The city- to save on costs, stay in a hotel outside of the city and take the train in
- A historical town- my best friend and I, plan to do this in the Spring. See I’m already planning my next get away!
- Bed and breakfast or Airbnb in a cool area
- Go visit another girlfriend who moved away, that you both don’t get to see much.
- Somewhere with great shopping or cute shops to explore.
- A retreat where you can do something crafty.
Hopefully this encouraged you to do yourself a favor and get away and reenergize yourself!
If you do get away, let me know where you went! I would love to know what you decided to do!
